I'm making a batch of ornaments to ship out with this month's Little Black Box sample shipment. I need to make 100, so to avoid the tedium of making just penguins and cardinals, I've been experimenting with making some new birds.

I'm about two thirds of the way through my task and I'm astounded by how much time this is taking me. I estimated that I could do about 30 birds per hour, but it's turning out to be about a third of that. I always overestimate my output!

I think I'm going to need a break from polymer clay for a little while. I noticed a lot of new smudges around the kitchen sink, on some of the light switches and along some of the walls in the house. It look me a little while to figure out that they all came from me. There is something about the new, softer formula of that really makes it cling to the skin on my hands after a while. Even with intense soap and water, I still retain a patina of clay and the house is starting to look once again like a steel worker lives here. I think I need to find out whatever they use to clean baby ducks soiled by oil spills, buy a bucket, and spray the whole house with it.

Labels: cute, polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 10/26/2009 05:08:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Sunday, October 25, 2009

Project #266 - Dinosaur Family

This set of cake toppers was a disaster from the beginning. From the benign Barney the Dinosaur looks of my supposedly vicious T-Rex, to the total collapse of my Brontosaurs (which doesn't even exist anymore), this was a failure of design.

I spent so long mix, mix, mixing the special sparkly color, that it's a little disappointing that these are destined for disposal. I don't know what to do with them, on the one hand it's hard to toss anything with that much time and energy behind it. But on the other hand, what can you do with a dinosaur with a broken neck?

I'll use the T-Rex as a package embellishment for Christmas, but the other one will just have to serve as a lesson in hubris. Oh, and a lesson learned that long necks need structural integrity.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 10/25/2009 07:48:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Friday, October 23, 2009

Project #264 - Fake Cake Tier

I'm trying to improve my presentation in my Etsy store, so I decided to redo some of the pictures of my cake toppers in order to make them look more cake topperish. They are already a little unconventional, so anything to put them in context would be a service.

My solution was to make it look like they are sitting on an actual cake. Real cake would just get old and get frosting all over them. Plus, I hate the idea of making a cake I can't eat. So, instead I made a reusable fake cake, one that would last and showcase my wares in the best way.



I merely took a paper-mache box from the craft store, painted it white, and covered the top with a carefully blended mix of white and transparent polymer clay, a mix that would look just like fondant. The oven temperature needed to set the clay is much less than what would burn paper, so I was able to bake the whole thing without much trouble.

I am now ready for some commerce!

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 10/23/2009 05:19:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Friday, October 09, 2009

Project #252 - Wedding Cake Cake Topper with Rosettes

Okay, take two. The more I look at the first set of wedding cake toppers, the goofier they look. So, I took a little extra time today and made a more serious set, with better actual wedding cake resemblance. I should package them with a seal that says exactly that. "NOW WITH ACTUAL WEDDING CAKE RESEMBLANCE!!" Oh, and "NOW WITH FRESH VANILLA SCENT!!" I will sell millions.



I would need special tools to add faces to the people at the top of the cake. Do half inch tall people with no faces freak people out? I could spin it in a positive light. "NOW WITH DISAPPOINTMENT-FREE FACES!!"

Labels: polymer clay, projects, wedding

posted by Alison 10/09/2009 07:07:00 PM : (0) comments : splink

Project #251 - Dia De Los Muertos Cake Toppers

Sugar skulls are not that tasty, but I will still eat them with my mouth until gone. I love sugar a little to much.

I'm Hispanic, but I wasn't raised in a culture that celebrates Dia de los Muertos. Instead, we celebrated All Saints Day and the children in my church could dress up like their favorite saint. It was a second, Catholic halloween and every year I dressed as Joan of Arc. We were expected to pray for the souls of our deceased friends and family, especially the ones that died within the year before, but not with the pomp and ritual of the Day of the Dead.

It's a holiday I wish we had. To me, I wish there was a less painful was of saying hello/goodbye to loved ones every year. I'm on board for anything that involves a celebration and party favors and sugary treats in lieu of sitting alone and crying during the hard years.



More importantly, they glow in the dark. That is not only awesome, but useful in case of a power outage to keep guests from tripping over the cake.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 10/09/2009 05:05:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Thursday, October 08, 2009

Project #250 - Wedding Cake Cake Topper

Continuing on my wedding cake topper trend, I decided to carry out my previous imagining of a wedding cake topped with smaller wedding cakes. I wanted the wedding cake cake toppers with even tinier wedding cake cake toppers, but they looked a little too abstract to be read as tiny wedding cakes. So, I replaced them with tiny brides and grooms.

I think this is one of the goofiest, dumbest things I've made for a while, but they make me smile on some primal level, possibly the same primal level that secretly enjoys Ziggy cartoons.

Labels: polymer clay, projects, weddings

posted by Alison 10/08/2009 05:06:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Project #249 - Teapot Cake Toppers

I'm glad that we, as a people, have managed to shed the confinement of pastel wedding colors and branch off into the more saturated areas of the color table. In fact, it's been ages since I attended a peach or mint green affair, two colors that seemed to be very popular circa 1974 according to my family albums. Even the weddings that I've attended lately with something pale like pink as a signature color always have something bold like chocolate brown to keep the palette from being washed out.

I like it. I like reds and bright blues and deep, limpid purples. I love golden yellow bridesmaid dresses and wedding cakes that reject the traditional white on white palette. It's pleasant to attend a wedding and spend an evening stewing in a carefully selected set of colors.



I'm kind of in love with bright blue and yellow as key colors right now. I made this coffee carafe and teapot out of some leftover blue polymer clay that transfixed me like a bower bird.

Also, I'm a tea aficionado married to a coffee fancier, so I kind of hope that I don't sell this set and get to keep it for...I don't know...something. Um, a birthday? I'm already married, but everyone needs a teapot with a veil, AMIRITE?

Labels: polymer clay, projects, wedding

posted by Alison 10/07/2009 05:05:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Thursday, October 01, 2009

Project #243 - Tiiiiny Cake with Rosettes

My love affair with tiny fake food will never die. It's the best use possible for the fingernail-sized scraps of polymer clay that end up in my work box. Plus, I figured out how to make tiny rosettes for this project (swirl of clay surrounded by flat dots of clay for outer petals), so high fives all around.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 10/01/2009 01:45:00 AM : (0) comments : splink


Saturday, September 26, 2009

Project #239 - Fake Chicken Eggs

In order to get chickens to do what you want, sometimes you have to play to their instincts. Chickens naturally prefer to lay eggs in a nest that has already been used. It's better to use a nest that has been proven safe rather than taking a chance and building a new, untested one. Most people take advantage of this chicken behavior and put out fake eggs in a place of their choosing. Otherwise, free-range chickens will just lay where they please and their humans are left playing a real-life Easter Egg hunt.

But why fake eggs? Why not use real ones from the supermarket? Chickens are curious and they have a way of discovering that real ones, even hard-boiled, are delicious. Once they go down that path it's hard to make them stop. They'll peck at the fake ones and then ignore all eggs because those first few sure weren't tasty.

Our chickens are almost old enough to start laying eggs and we'd prefer that we got a first crack at them. I decided to make a few test eggs out of polymer clay and see how they worked for the chickens. Polymer clay is expensive, so I decided to make two with different materials in the center to see which worked best. I wrapped my clay around a ping pong ball and a large marble and then baked them at 215 degrees F for 30 minutes.



The marble egg came out just right, but the ping pong ball one exploded right before I pulled it out of the oven. That's too bad because we have a lot of defunct table tennis balls sitting around the house that are dying for a purpose.

I'm going to make at least two or three more and add them to one of our nesting boxes. The funny thing is that these are supposed to work even if a chicken has never seen an egg. There is supposed to be something about round objects that trigger a nesting instinct in those little peanut brains.

Labels: menagerie, polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 9/26/2009 12:50:00 PM : (3) comments : splink


Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Project #234 - Baby Pengiuns

I guess wasn't done making penguins even though I ran through almost all of my black polymer clay making yesterday's penguins. Every flock needs their own little guys. I went through a few drafts trying some different beak, face and tummy colorations, but this was the better combination. Still, I think they need some work and it doesn't help that the metallic clay is a little weird.

Labels: cute, polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 9/16/2009 01:28:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Project #233 - Pengiun Army

I've been talking to friends of Clark who are keen at business about how they started their own companies. The best piece of advice that I've gotten is that I should only consider starting a business if it encompasses my passion, and, no, making lots of money doesn't really count as a passion. It's a cliche, of course, "Follow your passion", but they are right. I keep thinking of business ideas that would be profitable, but make me wince when I think about all of the tedious programming I would have to do just to set up a proof of concept.

Still, at the end of my fantasy of building a successful software company, I always sell it for a high price and retire to making and selling little things with my hands. Maybe I should just skip to the fun part at the end.

So, just to see if I could take hours and hours of making little things, I decided to make something big for once and put it up for sale in my etsy shop. I recreated my penguin decoration set from my wedding, but instead of making everything over the course of a few weeks I did it over two days. I think I handled my repetitive task well, but it was only for a few hours at a time.

I don't think I will be quitting my job anytime soon, but it's a nice chance to make a little extra money and get some feedback on what I'm working on.

If you're interested in buying lots and lots and lots of penguins, the Etsy listing is here.

Labels: cute, polymer clay, projects, weddings

posted by Alison 9/15/2009 01:57:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Sunday, September 13, 2009

Project #231 - Mini Mushrooms

I made tiny mushrooms for my planters, you know, because mushrooms are awesome. Though it is a little odd that the cutest mushrooms in nature are usually poisonous. For instance, I know of no red toadstools that won't at least make people violently sick when eaten. Hmm...there's a metaphor in here somewhere.

Also, speaking of eating dangerous mushrooms, I had to take these out of my herb planters immediately because the chickens thought they were food. It's like living with a backyard full of toddlers. I constantly have to chase them down yelling "What did you just put into your mouth!? Give it to me!!" Of course, the chickens are not fans of being yelled at, so I have to chase them down and hope they drop whatever little piece of plastic they were tasting.



I baked the mushrooms with little twisted pieces of wire inside them to keep them upright.

Labels: cute, polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 9/13/2009 08:13:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Saturday, September 12, 2009

Project #230 - Hamburger Cake Toppers

So, Clark and I had penguin cake toppers on our wedding cake, but I know that if Clark had been in charge, we would have had hamburger cake toppers. On a hamburger shaped cake. Scratch that, they would have been on top of a giant pile of hamburgers because the man does not really care for cake.

Sadly, he does not share my sweet tooth. That means that I usually get to eat his dessert (yay!), but he usually does not buy sweets (boo!).

Personally, if I could go back in time, I would top my wedding cake with miniature wedding cakes...that would be topped by even smaller wedding cakes. Hmm, I should make those anyway.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 9/12/2009 08:56:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Friday, September 11, 2009

Project #229 - Terrarrium

My husband really misses his ducks*, so I made a little terrarium scene with some mini replicas of our beloved Yama and Sabu. I wanted him to take it in to the office so he would have a little something green to look at during the winter.

Plus, nothing says love like a terrarium.



He is also a big fan of moss so I dug up a patch from the concrete on the side of our house and arranged it to fit in the jar. I had a bare spot, so I added a little clover plant, too. They are both from a super shady part of the yard, so they should both be kept out of direct sunlight.



The jar doesn't drain, so I have a layer of gravel at the bottom to absorb excess water without completely removing it from the system. The soil is ordinary potting soil and the moss is just sitting on top.

Keeping the moisture equilibrium in the jar shouldn't be hard. Just open the jar if the glass fogs up, and spritz it with water if the moss feels dry. Otherwise, the jar should be sealed.



*In case you missed it, the ducks moved back in with their breeder because duck quacks do, in fact, echo, especially at 6 am on a Saturday. Just in case you're worried, the breeder does not eat birds.

Labels: gardening, polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 9/11/2009 01:55:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Project #227 - Turtle Cake Toppers

Sometimes things just don't work out. Sometimes your head pops off in the oven and fuses to your torso.



Oh well, it's nothing that a little glue can't fix. Still, I'm not in love with the way these turtles are sitting, probably because real turtles don't sit. Their limbs somehow look too long and too short at the same time; it's just awkward. Oh well, I'm going to chalk this one up to experience.



I do think the flower is cute, so I might start using it elsewhere. It's a good way to specify animal gender without getting graphic.

Labels: polymer clay, projects, wedding

posted by Alison 9/09/2009 03:21:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Friday, August 28, 2009

Project #215 - Toadstool Cake Toppers

I've had a few recent encounters with mushrooms in the park and in the backyard. There's something really fascinating about how they seem to just appear overnight and don't bother to blend in with the scenery most of the time. On the one hand, they're delicious, and on the other they can kill you in pretty horrible ways (liver and kidney failure, for example).

I'm just starting to learn how to identify wild mushrooms. I can usually identify ones that I think are edible, but I lack the confidence to actually pluck, cook and eat ones I find in the wild.

Still, mushrooms are the cutest members of the fungi kingdom. Certainly, they're one of the few poisonous things I'd consider putting on a wedding cake.

Labels: polymer clay, projects, wedding

posted by Alison 8/28/2009 05:27:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Sunday, July 05, 2009

Project #173 - Polymer Clay Tiles

I have lots of extra bits of polymer clay leftover from two years worth of projects and they're starting to get annoying. They have a knack for falling out of the box and scattering under whatever furniture is nearby, picking up dust along the way.

Farewell, little bits, you have finally been turned into something useful.



I once again used one of my square cookie cutters (seriously, these are one of the most useful tools I own) and stamped my little tiles out of flat sheets of clay.



The trick to getting really nice, flat sheets of polymer clay is to use a pasta press. I got mine from a yard sale for $10, and I've seen at least three since then. They're like fondue sets, lots of people have ones that they've used once now just want their cupboard space back. You can buy them new in kitchen utensil or craft stores, but they will cost $30 or more.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 7/05/2009 11:52:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Thursday, July 02, 2009

Project #170 - Polymer Clay Cinnamon Rolls

I have a fierce sweet tooth. I love baking desserts, I love eating them and I love just looking at pictures of them. Occasionally, I dream about desserts, but I've never successfully eaten a dream pastry. To me, the best way to express love is through baked goods, preferably by giving them to me while they are still warm. It's an 'I love you' that you can eat, preferably in small bits over the course of a few days so that the maximum enjoyment can be extracted.



My husband does not really like desserts and doesn't really understand their importance to me. Still, he tries his best and brought home a cinnamon roll for Dozen in Lawrenceville. I ate half of it immediately.

{Pittsburgh secret: The best cinnamon rolls in the city are from Food, Glorious Food in Highland Park and are only sold on Saturday mornings. It's worth getting up early to have one before they are sold out, trust me.}



Of course, the giving of baked goods must be celebrated.

Man, cinnamon roll icing is hard to simulate in clay. It's got this drippy, gooey, translucent texture that I had a dickens of a time trying to replicate. I tried an alternative method using a lashing of glue, while it is better than the thick clay coil, it still needs work.



{UPDATE} The glue looked for a little while like it would be the best bet for simulating cinnamon roll icing, but unfortunately, it dried completely clear. That does not look appetizing at all.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 7/02/2009 11:46:00 PM : (1) comments : splink


Friday, June 05, 2009

Project #147 - Fimo Pie

I'm just one week sort of my goal of one month without buying snack foods, and more and more I've been thinking about sweet things. I've been baking a lot lately, but mostly for other people, so my sweet tooth has gone unsatisfied. It's a lot easier to make a polymer clay pie than to put together the real thing from scratch.

Plus, I ♥ miniature food.

Odds are that I'm going to make a pie sometime this week.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 6/05/2009 11:07:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Project #146 - Cupcake Knitting Needles

I am a terrible knitter. I'm slow and I lose track of stitches, so the most I could probably knit in one day would be a potholder. I have plenty of potholders.

However, I do like making novelty knitting needles so other people can knit cool stuff.



I will occasionally make my own needles, but I had a nice pair of #10 bamboo needles sitting around that were perfect for this project. I bought this set in Japan where nice sets of knitting needles are easy to find cheap.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 6/03/2009 11:31:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Project #145 - Donut Cake Topper

I've had this crazy fixation on donuts lately. I've been seeking out independent donut shops in Pittsburgh. The general consensus in the city is that Better-Maid Donuts is the best, but I prefer the yeasty, soft confections sold by Big Daddy's Donuts. Plus, Better-Maid is usually sold out by 9:00 am; Big Daddy's is open 24/7. Oh, and they have really good chili. Winner.

I made some cake toppers to celebrate the miracle of donuts out of my stash of Fimo clay. I left them in the oven a little too long, so the surface developed a few cracks. Oops.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 6/02/2009 10:50:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Thursday, April 30, 2009

Project #114 - Sorta Magnetic Pizzas

I lurve miniature food and I lurve magnets, so I put some tiny pizzas together that were supposed to act as refrigerator magnets. Above is a pepperoni pizza, a mushroom and green pepper pizza (my favorite), a black olive and hamburger pizza (Clark's favorite), and a green pepper, tomato, and pineapple pizza.



Sadly, my plan to encase the magnets in the clay didn't work out too well. I swear that the magnets have only a millimeter or two of clay between them and the outside air, but they can't even attach themselves to the fridge without sliding to the bottom, let alone hold up the 3-4 sheets of paper that I expect from my fridge magnets. And this was with super strong neodymium magnets! It's an outrage!



I tested the magnets using some magnetic film, just to see if they maybe got demagnetized in the over or something. Two of my pizzas are to the left and top and a bare neodymium magnet is to the lower right. So, there is some magnetism there, but I guess the field is too diffuse and weak to be useful. I glued some magnets to the outside so now they will finally stick to the fridge, but I liked the concealed magnet better.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 4/30/2009 10:07:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Monday, April 13, 2009

Project #98 - Cardinal Cake Toppers

I've never understood why wedding cake toppers are so effing expensive. Even the boring plastic ones run more than $30 for a set. Plastic birthday cake cowboys, however, are about $1 each, further proof that anything involving the word 'wedding' comes with a premium attached.

That's why I like making wedding cake toppers; it's almost like performing a public service. Today I made a set of cardinal cake toppers out of polymer clay. After I placed the two bright red birds side by side it suddenly clicked in my head that only male cardinals have that kind of coloring. The females are more of a dove gray.

I looked up cardinals to see if there were any sub-species where the females exhibit the same bright red feathers, but nope, it's sexual dimorphism all the way down. I also realized that that means that the queen from my earlier chess set is actually a dude.



So, I made a female bird with the correct coloring. She's sparkly, just like her male counterparts.



But they don't seem to be very interested in her. I don't know, I guess the two male cardinals match the picture in my head better.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 4/13/2009 09:15:00 PM : (1) comments : splink


Thursday, April 02, 2009

Project #88 - Eulogy for a Frog

Yesterday, after I got home I looked in my frog's tank and for the first time she didn't run away and hide as soon as she noticed me. Not good. I buried her in the backyard before my husband had the misfortune of seeing her like that. There was one uneaten cricket who gleefully jumped out of her cage when released in the backyard, the lone survivor of an insect Battle Royale.

I've never owned a pet that actively disliked my presence the way that Skinny did. She spent almost all of her time squatting in her cave, trying to hide as much of her body as possible. She would only leave it at night and if she thought we weren't home, although it was possible to catch an unsheltered Skinny stalking crickets if we approached quietly. Skinny always looked completely busted when spotted and any sudden movements would send her scrambling back to her hidey-hole.

Skinny was 3 years old when she died. We raised her from a fat, constantly pooping tadpole into a silent, shy adult. We started out with two tadpoles, Skinny and her gluttonous brother, Fatty. He died after eating too many crickets at once. Skinny never made the same mistake. She only ate when she was hungry and some crickets would wander terrified around her pondscape for days until she was ready to finally partake.

It's weird to live again in a house with zero pets. I suppose this is a sign that we shouldn't be pet owners...or parents.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 4/02/2009 11:37:00 PM : (1) comments : splink


Saturday, March 28, 2009

Project #83 - Hidden Chamber Hamburger

Lent has passed the 1 month mark and I'm starting to really fantasize about meat. Why do I do this to myself every year? I guess it's good for the environment to eat less meat, but it's so tasty that I have a hard time following through any other time of the year.

I miss hamburgers so much that I kind of want to hide little hamburgers instead of eggs this Easter. I made one today out of polymer clay with a little hollow chamber to hide a (generous, maybe) monetary prize.



I started out by forming the bun and meat patty (*drool*) parts. I used an old serger cone to measure out the hollows, but anything circular like a bottle cap will do.



I then added lettuce and cheese to my burger, rolling each flat whatever chunky markers I had handy. The cheese will go on top of the paddy, so I cut out the middle.



I used tiny neodymium magnets to hold the top of the bun in place. I pressed a stack of them into the unbaked clay on the bun top and on the cheese slice. I wiggled them around to make a depression slightly larger than my magnets. Polymer clay shrinks a little after baking, so this assures that the magnets will still fit.



Clark suggested that the hamburger would be a good place to hide a wedding ring, but that might be too rich for a regular Easter.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 3/28/2009 11:52:00 PM : (0) comments : splink


Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Project #81 - Mini Gargoyle

I learned something new today: the term 'gargoyle', used in a strictly architectural sense, only covers decorative figures that function as downspouts. Those stone demon figures that I think of when I hear the word 'gargoyle' are called 'chimeras' or 'grotesques' by architects to distinguish the downspout type from its decorative counterpart. I guess I should call my little sculpture a 'Mini Grotesque instead'.

This little guy is supposed to be a tax-time demon, the good kind that helps you find receipts and discover new deductions. If I were to make a bad tax time demon it would probably have a big vacuum cleaner and an audit dartboard, which would be funnier if our taxes were already done and filed.



Here is a view of the wings and tail in the back. I like putting high, male-pattern-baldness hairlines on my polymer clay creations. I have a hard time sculpting the clay to look like hair, so in this case less is more.

Labels: polymer clay, projects

posted by Alison 3/25/2009 10:47:00 PM : (0) comments : splink